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#1435510 - 29/09/2017 21:36 Re: Monday night giggle - joke thread... [Re: TrenthamStormchasers]
Wild Wassa Offline
Weather Freak

Registered: 17/03/2012
Posts: 390
Loc: NW ACT
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him.

She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him. He appears deep in thought, just staring at the wall.

She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee. "What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room, "Why are you down here at this time of night?"

"Do you remember when I met you and you were only 16?" he asks solemnly.

The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring & sensitive.

"Yes, I do" she replies. The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily....

"Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car, making love?"

"Yes, I remember!" says the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.

The husband continues..."Do you remember when he shoved a shotgun in my face and said, "either you marry my daughter or I will send you to jail for 20 years?'"

"I remember that too" she replies softly.

"He wipes another tear from his cheek, and says... "I would have gotten out today.
_________________________
No one's a bushman in a fog.

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#1436091 - 05/10/2017 06:55 Re: Monday night giggle - joke thread... [Re: TrenthamStormchasers]
Wild Wassa Offline
Weather Freak

Registered: 17/03/2012
Posts: 390
Loc: NW ACT
'What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas' ... this slogan is one of the more famous taglines in modern tourism marketing and one of the most quoted and recognised ad campaigns in history. This slogan is total BS.

American society not being a death cult, is the joke.



Edited by Wild Wassa (05/10/2017 07:00)
_________________________
No one's a bushman in a fog.

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#1436162 - 05/10/2017 19:18 Re: Monday night giggle - joke thread... [Re: TrenthamStormchasers]
samboz Offline
Weatherzone Addict

Registered: 16/11/2014
Posts: 1806
Loc: Between Maffra & the Mountains...
Thanks
_________________________
Rain 2016-753.5mm.J-173mmF-5mmM-66mmA-32.5mmM-24mmJ-88mmJ-143mmA-17.5mmS-89.5mmO-53.5mmNov-61.5mmDec-26mmTOTAL 2016 - 779.5MM Rain 2017.Jan-9.5mmFeb-23mmMarch-49mmApril-40mmMay-12mmJune-12mmJuly-15mm Aug-36.5mm Sept-26mm Oct-18mm to 0900 20th.

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#1436187 - 06/10/2017 10:13 Re: Monday night giggle - joke thread... [Re: TrenthamStormchasers]
ozone doug Offline
Weatherzone Addict

Registered: 06/11/2006
Posts: 1646
Loc: Roma SW QLD Eye to the West...
New Steven Seagal blow up doll.
Probably the coolest thing about this new Steven Seagal blow up doll is the ego inside inflates itself. grin
_________________________
Cheers Doug. 491 Doug/ uhf ch50 and ch40 When severe weather
BOM Stormspotter G0388 Roma S W Queensland Formerly Redcliffe.
https://www.wunderground.com/personal-weather-station/dashboard?ID=IQUEENSL852

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#1436225 - 06/10/2017 17:47 Re: Monday night giggle - joke thread... [Re: TrenthamStormchasers]
Beltane Offline
Weather Freak

Registered: 15/10/2001
Posts: 441
Loc: Warriewood 2102 NSW
It's the AFL Grand Final at the MCG, and a man makes his way to his seat in the Members Stand.

He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty.

He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there.

"No" says the neighbor.

"The seat is empty."

"This is incredible," said the man.

"Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Richmond versus Adelaide Grand Final and not use it?"

The neighbor says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away.
This is the first Grand Final Cup we haven't been to together since we got married."

"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that.
That's terrible...
But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?"

The man shakes his head.
"No,” he says.
“They're all at the funeral."
_________________________
Beltane

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#1436539 - 10/10/2017 12:35 Re: Monday night giggle - joke thread... [Re: TrenthamStormchasers]
J Pabo Offline
Weather Freak

Registered: 12/10/2012
Posts: 310
Read this out loud.

This is this cat.
This is is cat.
This is how cat.
This is to cat.
This is keep cat.
This is an cat.
This is idiot cat.
This is busy cat.
This is for cat.
This is forty cat.
This is seconds cat.

Now go back and read the third word only in each line from the start.


Edited by J Pabo (10/10/2017 12:39)

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